(Photo
by
Drew
Angerer/Getty
Images)
After
taunting
Arizona
prosecutors
struggling
to
serve
him,
Rudy
Giuliani
threw
a
birthday
bash
that
he
hyped
on
social
media
—
a
move
culminating
in
the
process
server
showing
up
and
handing
the
disbarred
former
mayor
his
papers.
The
direct
relationship
between
fucking
around
and
finding
out
continues
into
infinity.
Now
fully
ensconced
as
a
defendant
in
the
criminal
case
arising
from
the
effort
to
install
fake
electors
in
2020,
Giuliani
is
subject
to
standard
requirements
that
a
criminal
defendant
not
leave
the
state
while
the
case
is
pending.
As
a
non-resident,
Rudy
didn’t
want
to
be
stuck
in
Arizona
and
the
prosecutors
didn’t
really
want
him
stuck
there
either,
so
all
sides
agreed
to
modify
the
conditions
of
his
release
to
send
him
home.
But
Giuliani
took
the
opportunity
to
do
a
little
editorializing…
Specifically,
this
discourse:
Mr.
Giuliani
is
a
great
American
Hero
and
Patriot
whose
endurance,
swift
action,
and
determination
inspired
all
people
in
the
United
States
during
a
time
of
great
national
turmoil
and
stress.Would
anyone
think
it
necessary
to
require
George
Washington
to
reside
in
a
particular
state
and
not
leave
that
state
without
the
permission
of
the
court
if
charges
were
filed
against
him
in
that
state
during
his
life?
The
answer
is
an
emphatic
“No!”
Then
the
same
is
true
for
Mr.
Giuliani.
“If”
performs
a
lot
of
heavy
lifting
in
that
sentence
as
Washington
was
not
—
*checks
notes*
—
ever
charged
with
attempting
to
defraud
voters.
Honestly,
and
to
the
contrary,
IF
Washington
attempted
to
seize
power
through
illegal
means,
it
probably
would
be
necessary
to
require
him
not
leave
the
state
in
an
era
of
horse-and-buggy
travel.
As
Cheney
notes,
the
judge
granted
the
unopposed
motion
but
was
less
than
pleased
with
the
commentary:
Consistent
with
principles
of
equal
protection
under
the
law,
Defendant
Giuliani
is
not
entitled
to
greater
or
lesser
consideration
of
requested
relief
because
of
his
alleged
status
or
stature.
Any
suggestion
to
the
contrary
goes
against
all
concepts
of
justice.
Going
forward,
the
court
expects
all
parties
to
limit
their
filings
and
arguments
to
cognizable
claims
that
are
supported
by
relevant
facts
and
law.
If
Judge
Bruce
Cohen
really
expects
that…
then
he’s
not
familiar
with
Rudy’s
work.
In
fact,
his
alleged
inability
to
limit
himself
to
“cognizable
claims
that
are
supported
by
relevant
facts
and
law”
is
sort
of
how
we
got
to
this
point.
Joe
Patrice is
a
senior
editor
at
Above
the
Law
and
co-host
of
Thinking
Like
A
Lawyer.
Feel
free
to email
any
tips,
questions,
or
comments.
Follow
him
on Twitter if
you’re
interested
in
law,
politics,
and
a
healthy
dose
of
college
sports
news.
Joe
also
serves
as
a
Managing
Director
at
RPN
Executive
Search.