Author: TSA Press

The
never-ending
Alex
Jones
bankruptcy
story
continues
this
afternoon
in
a
Texas
courtroom.
As
of
this
writing,
the
shitposter’s
lawyers
are
challenging
Chapter
7
Trustee
Christopher
Murray’s
selection
of
Global
Tetrahedron,
the
parent
company
of
“The
Onion,”
as
the
winning
bidder
of
the
auction
for
Free
Speech
Systems.

As
with
most
Jones
productions,
it’s
a
shitshow.
His
lawyer
spent
several
minutes
objecting
to
the
admission
of
documents
Jones
himself
signed
and
submitted
to
the
court

in
this
case.
Judge
Christopher
Lopez,
who
has
sounded
exhausted
by
the
Jones
cases
for
more
than
year
(and
he’s
been
at
this
shit
since
April
of
2022),
admitted
them,
but
not
for
the
authenticity
thereof.

Jones
recently
fired
his
longtime
counsel
Vickie
Driver,

replacing
her
with
experienced
bankruptcy
lawyer
Shelby
Jordan.
Jordan
immediately
turned
around
and

sued
Murray,
Global
Tetrahedraon,
and
even
the
Sandy
Hook
parents
themselves.

The

complaint
alleged
gross
malfeasance
by
the
trustee,
attacked
the
underlying
state
court
judgments,
and
insisted
that
the
sale
of
the
IP
assets
was
definitionally
illegal:

Mr.
Jones
has
property
rights
in
the
Jones
IP
Rights,
which
he
brings
this
action
to
both
obtain
a
declaration
of
ownership
of,
and
to
protect
through
injunctive
relief
against
anyone’s
unauthorized
use
thereof,
including
without
limitation,
Alex
Jones’s
unique
and
personal
name,
image,
likeness,
unique
voice,
and/or
other
personal
identifying
attributes
associated
with
Alex
Jones
which
belong
to
him
personally
and
cannot
be
sold.
Among
other
things,
consumers
will
suffer
massive
market
confusion
if
his
personal
rights
are
marketed
by
anyone
other
than
himself.

Jordan
made
clear
that
this
claim
extended
to
cover
the
Infowars
back
catalog
to
include
any
recording
that
included
Jones’s
name,
image,
or
voice.
He
also
filed
an

objection
to
the
sale
repeating
his
scurrilous
allegations
against
Murray.

Within
hours
Murray
docketed
a

blistering
response
noting
that
“The
Debtor
does

not
own
the
assets
the
Trustee
seeks
to
sell
pursuant
to
the
Sale
Motion,
they
are
property
of
FSS
and
his
personal
bankruptcy
estate—which
he
notably
failed
to
include
on
his
sworn
Schedules
notwithstanding
being
given
multiple
opportunities
to
amend.”

Specifically,
on
June
28,
2024,
just
after
he
converted
his
case
from
Chapter
11
to
Chapter
7,
Jones
signed
and
docketed
a

schedule
of
all
his
assets
and
debts.
And

when
asked
to
declare
any
“Patents,
copyrights,
trademarks,
trade
secrets,
and
other
intellectual
property,
Examples:
Internet
domain
names,
websites,
proceeds
from
royalties
and
licensing,”
he
checked
the
box
that
said
“no.”

“It
is
beyond
peradventure
that
Jones
was
required
to
schedule
the
FSS
IP
Assets
if,
as
he
contends,
they
are
his
property—and
indeed,
so
personal
to
him
that
they
cannot
be
owned
by
another,”
Murray
argued,
observing
that
“He
takes
a
different
position
now
in
an
unsworn
pleading
because
it
is
expedient
for
him
to
do
so.
Concealment
of
assets
and
such
gamesmanship
is
strictly
prohibited
under
the
Bankruptcy
Code
and
related
laws.”

And
that
schedule is
the
document
Jordan
objected
to
entering
into
evidence
at
this
afternoon’s
hearing
during
Murray’s
direct
examination
on
the
topic
of
how
he
structured
the
assets
for
the
sale.

Incidentally,
Murray
testified
that
The
Onion
agreed
to
take
Alex
Jones’s
personal
handles
out
of
the
auction
so
they
could
stop
wasting
time
on
this
dumb
issue.
And
the
lawyers
for
Ex-Twitter
said
yesterday
that
the
dispute
over
the
sale
of
the
personal
social
media
handles
had
been
resolved
by
stipulation
(dashing
the
hopes
of
the
Infowars
fans
who
had
been
led
to
believe
that
Elon
Musk
was
going
to
ride
to
the
rescue).

This
evening,
Jordan
will
get
to
yell
at
Murray
for
a
couple
hours
on
cross.
And
then
—

god
willin’
and
the
crick
don’t
rise!
—
this
nonsense
will
be
over.
Drink!

Alexander
E.
Jones
and
Official
Committee
Of
Unsecured
Creditors [Docket
via
Court
Listener]

---

Liz
Dye lives
in
Baltimore
where
she
produces
the
Law
and
Chaos substack and podcast.

The
never-ending
Alex
Jones
bankruptcy
story
continues
this
afternoon
in
a
Texas
courtroom.
As
of
this
writing,
the
shitposter’s
lawyers
are
challenging
Chapter
7
Trustee
Christopher
Murray’s
selection
of
Global
Tetrahedron,
the
parent
company
of
“The
Onion,”
as
the
winning
bidder
of
the
auction
for
Free
Speech
Systems.

As
with
most
Jones
productions,
it’s
a
shitshow.
His
lawyer
spent
several
minutes
objecting
to
the
admission
of
documents
Jones
himself
signed
and
submitted
to
the
court

in
this
case.
Judge
Christopher
Lopez,
who
has
sounded
exhausted
by
the
Jones
cases
for
more
than
year
(and
he’s
been
at
this
shit
since
April
of
2022),
admitted
them,
but
not
for
the
authenticity
thereof.

Jones
recently
fired
his
longtime
counsel
Vickie
Driver,

replacing
her
with
experienced
bankruptcy
lawyer
Shelby
Jordan.
Jordan
immediately
turned
around
and

sued
Murray,
Global
Tetrahedraon,
and
even
the
Sandy
Hook
parents
themselves.

The

complaint
alleged
gross
malfeasance
by
the
trustee,
attacked
the
underlying
state
court
judgments,
and
insisted
that
the
sale
of
the
IP
assets
was
definitionally
illegal:

Mr.
Jones
has
property
rights
in
the
Jones
IP
Rights,
which
he
brings
this
action
to
both
obtain
a
declaration
of
ownership
of,
and
to
protect
through
injunctive
relief
against
anyone’s
unauthorized
use
thereof,
including
without
limitation,
Alex
Jones’s
unique
and
personal
name,
image,
likeness,
unique
voice,
and/or
other
personal
identifying
attributes
associated
with
Alex
Jones
which
belong
to
him
personally
and
cannot
be
sold.
Among
other
things,
consumers
will
suffer
massive
market
confusion
if
his
personal
rights
are
marketed
by
anyone
other
than
himself.

Jordan
made
clear
that
this
claim
extended
to
cover
the
Infowars
back
catalog
to
include
any
recording
that
included
Jones’s
name,
image,
or
voice.
He
also
filed
an

objection
to
the
sale
repeating
his
scurrilous
allegations
against
Murray.

Within
hours
Murray
docketed
a

blistering
response
noting
that
“The
Debtor
does

not
own
the
assets
the
Trustee
seeks
to
sell
pursuant
to
the
Sale
Motion,
they
are
property
of
FSS
and
his
personal
bankruptcy
estate—which
he
notably
failed
to
include
on
his
sworn
Schedules
notwithstanding
being
given
multiple
opportunities
to
amend.”

Specifically,
on
June
28,
2024,
just
after
he
converted
his
case
from
Chapter
11
to
Chapter
7,
Jones
signed
and
docketed
a

schedule
of
all
his
assets
and
debts.
And

when
asked
to
declare
any
“Patents,
copyrights,
trademarks,
trade
secrets,
and
other
intellectual
property,
Examples:
Internet
domain
names,
websites,
proceeds
from
royalties
and
licensing,”
he
checked
the
box
that
said
“no.”

“It
is
beyond
peradventure
that
Jones
was
required
to
schedule
the
FSS
IP
Assets
if,
as
he
contends,
they
are
his
property—and
indeed,
so
personal
to
him
that
they
cannot
be
owned
by
another,”
Murray
argued,
observing
that
“He
takes
a
different
position
now
in
an
unsworn
pleading
because
it
is
expedient
for
him
to
do
so.
Concealment
of
assets
and
such
gamesmanship
is
strictly
prohibited
under
the
Bankruptcy
Code
and
related
laws.”

And
that
schedule is
the
document
Jordan
objected
to
entering
into
evidence
at
this
afternoon’s
hearing
during
Murray’s
direct
examination
on
the
topic
of
how
he
structured
the
assets
for
the
sale.

Incidentally,
Murray
testified
that
The
Onion
agreed
to
take
Alex
Jones’s
personal
handles
out
of
the
auction
so
they
could
stop
wasting
time
on
this
dumb
issue.
And
the
lawyers
for
Ex-Twitter
said
yesterday
that
the
dispute
over
the
sale
of
the
personal
social
media
handles
had
been
resolved
by
stipulation
(dashing
the
hopes
of
the
Infowars
fans
who
had
been
led
to
believe
that
Elon
Musk
was
going
to
ride
to
the
rescue).

This
evening,
Jordan
will
get
to
yell
at
Murray
for
a
couple
hours
on
cross.
And
then
—

god
willin’
and
the
crick
don’t
rise!
—
this
nonsense
will
be
over.
Drink!

Alexander
E.
Jones
and
Official
Committee
Of
Unsecured
Creditors [Docket
via
Court
Listener]

---

Liz
Dye lives
in
Baltimore
where
she
produces
the
Law
and
Chaos substack and podcast.

Ed.
note:
Welcome
to
our
daily
feature,

Quote
of
the
Day.

[W]ith
the
rise
in
hiring,
I
would
imagine
there
will
be
[an]
increase
in
failed
hires,
so
firms
will
rush
to
hire
attorneys
to
fill
holes
and
perhaps
not
do
their
proper
due
diligence
on
the
hiring
or
properly
integrate
the
hires.

—
Phil
Flora,
director
of
sales
at
Leopard
Solutions,
in
comments
given
to
the

American
Lawyer,
concerning
the
race
to
hire
attorney
talent
at

Biglaw
firms
with
“growth
mindsets,”
which
he
expects
to
continue
“across
the
board”
in
2025.
According
to
Flora,
who
tracks
industry
hiring,
“failed
hires”
happen
when
lateral
attorneys
leave
the
new
firm
almost
as
quickly
as
they
were
hired.
Per
Leopard’s
data,
~6%
of
lateral
partners
hired
in
the
last
two
years
have
already
left
their
firms
for
new
employment
opportunities.

---

Staci
Zaretsky is
a
senior
editor
at
Above
the
Law,
where
she’s
worked
since
2011.
She’d
love
to
hear
from
you,
so
please
feel
free
to

email
her
with
any
tips,
questions,
comments,
or
critiques.
You
can
follow
her
on Bluesky, X/Twitter,
and Threads, or
connect
with
her
on LinkedIn.

You
don’t
need
to
go
to
Stanford
Law
for
their
teachers
to
assign
you
reading!
The
faculty
compiled
an
end-of-the-year
reading
list
chock
full
of
pleasant
little
distractions
from
our
impending
rule
of
law
crises.
Who
has
time
to
worry
about
statutes
when
there
are
stories
like
these:

The
list
even
considers
the
little
ones
in
your
life
—
several
of
the
books
are
geared
toward
children!
Here’s
one
of
them:

The
list
is
worth
reading
in
its
own
right.
There’s
a
nice
balance
between
the
sparse
recommendations
like
“a
well-researched
account
of
Captain
Cook’s
last
voyage”
and
William
B.
Gould
IV’s
eight-book
rundown
of
things
worth
taking
up
space
on
your
bookshelf.
Or
nightstand.
Or
your
Goodreads
pages
so
can
virtue
signal
how
erudite
you
manage
to
be
while
also
hitting
your
billables.

Happy
reading!

Stanford
Law
School’s
2024
End-of-Year
Faculty
Reading
List
[Stanford]

---

Chris
Williams
became
a
social
media
manager
and
assistant
editor
for
Above
the
Law
in
June
2021.
Prior
to
joining
the
staff,
he
moonlighted
as
a
minor
Memelord™
in
the
Facebook
group Law
School
Memes
for
Edgy
T14s.
 He
endured
Missouri
long
enough
to
graduate
from
Washington
University
in
St.
Louis
School
of
Law.
He
is
a
former
boatbuilder
who
cannot
swim, a
published
author
on
critical
race
theory,
philosophy,
and
humor,
and
has
a
love
for
cycling
that
occasionally
annoys
his
peers.
You
can
reach
him
by
email
at [email protected] and
by
tweet
at @WritesForRent.

London-based
attorney
Linda
Lu
has
made
her
way
through
a
number
of
Biglaw
firms
during
the
course
of
her
career,
including
Fried
Frank,
Cadwalader,
Wickersham
&
Taft,
and
Pillsbury
Winthrop
Shaw
Pittman.
Now
she’ll
be
getting
a
very
different
view
of
the
legal
system
—
from
jail.
And
it’s
all
because
of
a
garden
hedge.

In
October,
Lu,
along
with
her
mother,
Susan
Chen,
was
convicted
of
stalking
that
caused
serious
alarm
or
distress.
Last
week,
they
were
sentenced
to
five
and
a
half
years
in
jail.
As

reported
by
Legal
Cheek,
the
judge
was
appalled
by
their
behavior:

On
sentencing,
Judge
James
House
KC
said
that
the
pair
had
begun
a
“persistent,
calculated
and
appalling
series
of
behaviours
designed
to
cause
the
victims
the
maximum
distress
possible”,
adding
that
it
was
“one
of
the
most
serious
cases
of
this
kind
that
this
court
has
had
to
deal
with”.

So
what
exactly
happened?
Well,
in
July
2023,
Lu’s
neighbors,
James
and
Lynn
Smith,
attempted
to
trim
the
hedge
between
their
property
and
the
one
rented
by
Chen.
That
resulted
in
Lu
“threatening
him
with
legal
action
from
an
upstairs
window.”
But
it
didn’t
stop
there.

Videos
recorded
by
Mr
Smith,
which
were
played
in
court,
reportedly
showed
Chen
and
Lu
“shouting
derogatory
abuse”,
including
the
use
of
terms
such
as
“retards”.

The
actions
continued
for
more
than
two
months
following
the
initial
dispute,
and
included
alleged
“periods
of
loud
metallic
banging”,
according
to
the
BBC’s
report.

Before
being
convicted,
Lu
and
Chen
were
sent
community
protection
notices,
warning
letters,
and
arrested
on
several
occasions
—
none
of
which
stopped
their
behavior.

In
addition
to
being
jailed
for
more
than
five
years,
orders
of
protection
were
also
granted
to
the
victims,
their
family,
other
witnesses,
or
their
employers
preventing
Lu
and
Chen
from
contacting
them.
Lu
and
Chen
cannot
be
anywhere
those
people
may
be
or
even
enter
the
village
of
Bassingham.

---

Kathryn
Rubino
is
a
Senior
Editor
at
Above
the
Law,
host
of

The
Jabot
podcast,
and
co-host
of

Thinking
Like
A
Lawyer.
AtL
tipsters
are
the
best,
so
please
connect
with
her.
Feel
free
to
email

her
with
any
tips,
questions,
or
comments
and
follow
her
on
Twitter

@Kathryn1 or
Mastodon

@[email protected].

On
November
13,
just
a
week
after
winning
reelection,
Matt
Gaetz
noped
out
of
the
House
of
Representatives.
In
theory,
this
was
so
he
could

go
exact
revenge
from
Donald
Trump’s
enemies
as
Attorney
General.
Trump’s
biggest
backer

gushed
on
his
personal
social
media
site
that
Gaetz
had
“a
big
brain,
a
spine
of
steel
and
an
axe
to
grind,”
making
him
the
ideal
candidate
to
serve
as
“our
Hammer
of
Justice.”

But
the
Hammer
had
apparently
been
indiscriminately
nailing
[cough]
everything
in
sight,
and
soon
his
nomination
was
withdrawn.
The
debacle
did
have
the
salubrious
—
for
Gaetz!
—
effect
of
ending
a
House
ethics
inquiry
which
reportedly
surfaced
testimony
that
he’d

paid
multiple
women
for
sex,
including
one
girl
who
was
a
minor
at
the
time.
This
would
appear
to
confirm

reporting
on
Gaetz’s
public
Venmo
history,
which
included
payments
to
women
for
“tuition,”
“school,”
and
“ice
cream.”

Recently
the
politician’s
career
has
taken
some
unexpected
turns.
He’s
headed
for
a
bottom-of-the-barrel
conspiracy
news
channel
that
got

dumped
from
basic
cable,
and
he
may
also
be
running
for
governor
of
Florida
in
2026.

Gaetz
will
be
joining
One
America
News
Network,
to
host
a
nightly
“news”
show
with
Dan
Ball,
an
anchor
whose
oeuvre
is
typified
by
a

hard-hitting
broadcast
where
he
made
fun
of
Rep.
Alexandra
Ocasio
Cortez
for
having
a
white
boyfriend.

Ball’s
schtick
is
to
yell
incoherently
about
various
culture
war
issues,
which
he’ll
be
doing
nightly
at
6pm
with
Gaetz
starting
in
January.
His
post
tagging
reporter
Chanel
Rion
would
appear
to
suggest
that
she’ll
be
joining
them
on
the
show,
bringing
her
signature
joie
de
vivre.
Rion
is
most
famous
for

trailing
along
after
Rudy
Giuliani
in
2019
as
he
pratfalled
his
way
through
Ukraine
looking
for
evidence
of
Biden
corruption.
At
one
point,
Rion

claimed
that
they
had
narrowly
escaped
octogenarian
philanthropist
George
Soros,
who
was
leading
a
squad
of
goons
hellbent
on
taking
them
down.
Gaetz,
who
was

reprimanded
by
the
Florida
Bar
for
attempted
to
intimidate
Michael
Cohen
by
falsely
implying
that
he’d
had
an
extramarital
affair,
should
fit
right
in.

But
if
his
broadcast
career
doesn’t
work
out,
Gaetz
appears
to
have
an
escape
plan.
As
Forbes
reporter
Zach
Everson
noted,
the
recently
registered

Florida
Firebrand
PAC
appears
to
have
ties
to
Gaetz
and
his
staffers.
And
the
panhandle
politician
has
long
been
rumored
to
be
contemplating
a
run
in
Florida’s
2026
gubernatorial
campaign.

Tough
break
that
his
new
show
is

barely
accessible
in
Florida,
huh?
Well,
to
be
fair,
you
can
watch
it,
but
you
have
to
pay.
No
word
if
the
network
accepts
Venmo.

---

Liz
Dye lives
in
Baltimore
where
she
produces
the
Law
and
Chaos substack and podcast.

With
2024
nearly
in
the
rearview
mirror,
we
thought
it
would
be
a
good
time
to
solicit
nominations
for
Above
the
Law’s
annual

LAWYER
OF
THE
YEAR competition.
Which
lawyers
made
major
headlines
during
the
year
that
was?

We’ll
conduct
the
competition
as
we’ve
done
for
the
past
decade.
Please
submit
your
nominees
to
us by
email
(subject
line
“Lawyer
of
the
Year
2024”).
We
will
review
them
and
pick
a
slate
of
finalists,
and
then
you’ll
vote
on
them
in
a
reader
poll.

The
winner
will
join
an
august
group
of
past
LOTY
honorees,
including
Chief
Justice John
Roberts (2012)
and
President Barack
Obama
(2008).
But
the
contest
has
room
for
“fun”
as
well.
In
2019,
Christopher
Hook,
a
lawyer
who

told
a
Biglaw
partner
to
“eat
a
bowl
of
dicks” during
settlement
negotiations
took
home
the
grand
prize,
and
in
2015,
our
champion
was
a
young
Texas
lawyer
by
the
name
of
Bryan
Wilson
—
better
known
to
the
world
as
the
“Law
Hawk,”
famous
for
his irreverent
and
creative
attorney
advertisements.

What
does
it
take
to
be
nominated?
As
we’ve
explained before:

What
are
the
criteria
for
being
our
Lawyer
of
the
Year?
Since
you’re
doing
the
nominating
and
voting,
it’s
really
up
to
you.

You
can
nominate
a
LOTY
based
on
whatever
reasoning
you
choose
—
e.g.,
because
the
lawyer
in
question
is
influential,
infamous,
awesome,
or
awful.

As
reflected
in
the
past
victory
of Loyola
2L (2007),
not
all
nominees
need
to
be
famous
—
or
even
named.
And
as
with
the
past
victory
of
Kyle
McEntee
and
Patrick
Lynch
(2010),
the
co-founders
of Law
School
Transparency,
you
can
nominate
multiple
people
if
their
achievements
are
closely
related.

We
have
only
three
things
to
ask
of
you
before
the
nominations
begin
to
roll
in:

• Please
  try
  to
  nominate
  actual
  lawyers.
• Please
  try
  to
  nominate
  lawyers
  who
  are
  still
  living.
• Please
  submit
  all
  nominations via
  email,
  with
  this
  exact
  subject
  line:
  “Lawyer
  of
  the
  Year
  2024.”

Let
the
nominations
begin!
Please
submit
your
nominations
by THURSDAY,
DECEMBER
12,
at
11:59
p.m.
(Eastern
time).
We
look
forward
to
reading
your
thoughts
and
insights
on
the
potential
candidates
who
will
go
on
to
vie
for
the
title
of
Above
the
Law’s
Lawyer
of
the
Year
for
2024.

---

Staci
Zaretsky is
a
senior
editor
at
Above
the
Law,
where
she’s
worked
since
2011.
She’d
love
to
hear
from
you,
so
please
feel
free
to

email
her
with
any
tips,
questions,
comments,
or
critiques.
You
can
follow
her
on Bluesky, X/Twitter,
and Threads, or
connect
with
her
on LinkedIn.

This
fall
we
introduced
our
list
of
the


Most
Desirable
Law
Firms,
highlighting
the
law
firms
that
attorneys
most
want
to
work
for. 

Now,
we
are
pleased
to
release
our
annual
ranking
of
the

Top
Outside
Counsel,
featuring
the
firms
that
clients
depend
on
most.

Every
year
since
2018,
Above
the
Law
has
published
a
list
of
the
top
law
firms
in
the
country,
based
on
the
insights
of
those
who
know
best
—
the
in-house
attorneys
who
hire
them.

This
year,
approximately
550
in-house
lawyers
shared
their
evaluations
of
the
law
firms
their
organizations
work
with.

The
premise
of
our
survey
is
simple
and
straightforward.
We
asked
two
questions:
1)
Which
law
firms
does
your
company
engage
for
legal
services?
and
2)
Please
indicate
the
highest
level
legal
work
for
which
your
company
will
engage
the
particular
firm(s).
The
levels
of
work
were
defined
along
a
four-point
scale:

1. 
   Cost-efficient,
   bulk
   tasks
2. 
   Routine
   matters
3. 
   High-value,
   complex
   matters
4. 
   “Bet-the-company”
   matters

The
ratings
for
each
firm
were
averaged
and
the
law
firms
with
the
highest
average
scores
made
it
into
our
list
of
the
Top
Outside
Counsel.
Check
out
the
results


here.