Morning Docket: 12.26.19

(Photo by Alex Wong/Getty Images)

* The lawyer for an indicted Giuliani associate is seeking to step down because of his client’s inability to pay his fees. [The Hill]

* Speaking of Rudy Giuliani, the former mayor is facing backlash for falsely claiming on Facebook that he is a “former attorney general of the United States” even though he never held the high post at the Justice Department. [Daily Beast]

* An attorney who was accused of assisting a jailhouse drug smuggling ring has been accused of a hit and run as well. The attorney may be a criminal lawyer… [WTAE Pittsburgh]

* A disgraced Massachusetts lawyer has been sentenced to two years in prison for tax fraud. [Massachusetts Lawyers Weekly]

* Harvey Weinstein may face criminal charges in Los Angeles as well as his pending criminal charges in New York. [LA Times]


Jordan Rothman is a partner of The Rothman Law Firm, a full-service New York and New Jersey law firm. He is also the founder of Student Debt Diaries, a website discussing how he paid off his student loans. You can reach Jordan through email at jordan@rothmanlawyer.com.

Zimbabwe doctor strike: Healthcare system is on the brink – The Zimbabwean

26.12.2019 10:56

Abandoned by a broken health system, many people in Zimbabwe are left to cope however they can or left to suffer alone.

There is no end in sight to a medical staff strike in Zimbabwe.

Many doctors are not working because they are fighting for better pay and for a cleanup of the healthcare system.

It means many people needing medical care have very few options to get treatment.

Some say the situation has even made their conditions worse.

Al Jazeera’s Nicolas Haque reports from Bulawayo:

Post published in: Featured

‘We’d Prefer the Food’: Zimbabwe Fears a Famine Is in Its Future – The Zimbabwean

The crowd of 150 reacted with disbelief and anger.

“Life is hard, all things are expensive, there are no price controls and inflation just keeps getting worse,” said Benjamini Dunha, 57, a plumber who makes 700 Zimbabwe dollars a month — about $38 at official exchange rates. Less than a year ago, his salary was worth much closer to $700.

Another shopper, Nyasha Domboka, 52, spoke cynically about a truckful of maize meal, also known as mealie meal, that he had just seen in the depot parking lot. “How can mealie-meal packed just recently be said to have gone bad all of a sudden?” he asked.

A combination of government dysfunction, an economic meltdown, droughts and a calamitous cyclone this past March have hurtled Zimbabwe toward a hunger disaster that has become the most severe in southern Africa and among the most alarming in the world. While food is not necessarily scarce yet, it is becoming unaffordable for all but the privileged few.

Credit…Zinyange Auntony/Agence France-Presse — Getty Images

“I cannot stress enough the urgency of the situation in Zimbabwe,” Hilal Elver, an independent United Nations human rights expert on food security, said after a 10-day visit in November. Sixty percent of the country’s 14 million people, Ms. Elver said, are “food-insecure, living in a household that is unable to obtain enough food to meet basic needs.”

Hunger in Africa is a pervasive problem, but in Zimbabwe, once known as the continent’s breadbasket, it has been compounded by dysfunction that has left the country in its most serious economic crisis in a decade. The annual inflation rate, which the International Monetary Fund has called the world’s highest, is 300 percent.

Maize meal, a staple of the Zimbabwean diet, doubled in price in November to 101 Zimbabwe dollars per 10-kilogram sack. Now it costs 117. In early December, a two-liter bottle of cooking oil cost 59 Zimbabwe dollars. Now it costs more than 72.

“The money here is valueless now,” said Mr. Dunha, who has eight children. All they can afford to eat, he said, are vegetables and sadza, a thick porridge of boiled maize meal.

Gerald Bourke, a spokesman for the southern Africa operations of the World Food Program, the anti-hunger agency of the United Nations, said that until recently, 60 percent of its assistance to Zimbabweans was in the form of cash, but that the recipients no longer want the money.

“Inflation is a rampant problem and people said, ‘we’d prefer the food,’’’ Mr. Bourke said.

Lining up to withdraw the new Zimbabwe currency in Harare last month. 

Credit…Jekesai Njikizana/Agence France-Presse — Getty Images

So by January, he said, the agency intends to switch to a “fully in-kind food program” for the first time in Zimbabwe, distributing monthly rations of grain, oil and nutritional supplements for children younger than 5. The agency also will double the number of recipients to four million.

“This is certainly the worst we are seeing in southern Africa,” Mr. Bourke said during a mid-December field visit to Harare, the capital. While cases of acute hunger have not been uncommon in rural Zimbabwe, “it’s seen in the cities now,” he said. “Hungry people in the countryside are moving to the cities” in search of food.

The finance minister, Mthuli Ncube, said on Friday that the government would be spending 180 million Zimbabwe dollars a month on subsidies as part of an effort to keep the price of maize meal stable.

But for many Zimbabweans, there is fear that the inflation problem portends a return to the days more than a decade ago when a trip to buy groceries required wheelbarrows of cash. Even now, purchases of anything beyond maize meal is considered a luxury.

“We used to buy favorite foods such as ice cream, cheese, bacon, sausages and ham and prepare good breakfasts for our families, “ said Moreblessing Nyambara, a 35-year-old Harare schoolteacher. “These things are a vision of the past now.”

Many historians attribute Zimbabwe’s predicament to the legacy of Robert Mugabe, the father of independence in 1980. An icon of African anti-colonialism, Mr. Mugabe became a despot and presided over the decline of what had been one of Africa’s most prosperous lands. He was ousted in 2017, and died in September at age 95.

Any hopes that Mr. Mugabe’s former ally and successor, Emmerson Mnangagwa, could revive Zimbabwe’s economy have almost completely faded.

“No progressive nation can progress without its own currency,” President Emmerson Mnangagwa said. “We will not revert back.”

Credit…Jekesai Njikizana/Agence France-Presse — Getty Images

This past June Mr. Mnangagwa scrapped a policy known as dollarization, in which the United States dollar and other foreign currencies were used as legal tender. That policy had been introduced in 2009, and helped end an era of hyperinflation, which had rendered the Zimbabwe dollar less valuable, literally, than the paper it was printed on.

But a newly introduced version of the Zimbabwe dollar has plunged in value, drastically raising the prices of goods priced in the currency.

Foreigners are reluctant to invest in Zimbabwe despite Mr. Mnangagwa’s proclamation that the country is “open for business.” Export sales and remittances from the Zimbabwean diaspora, important sources of United States dollars needed to import food and fuel, have fallen.

Mr. Mnangagwa has rejected calls to restore dollarization.

“No progressive nation can progress without its own currency,” he told members of the ruling ZANU-PF party at their annual conference in mid-December. “We will not revert back.”

Still, for now, the inflation problem remains less severe than what prevailed more than a decade ago.

At that time, prices were doubling every day, reaching a point where a single sheet of two-ply toilet paper cost nearly as much as a 500-Zimbabwe-dollar bill, then the smallest in circulation. That comparison spawned grim jokes about a better use for the currency.

Credit…Tsvangirayi Mukwazhi/Associated Press

Four million Zimbabweans are now not that far away from famine, according to a scale commonly used internationally to classify the severity of food insecurity and malnutrition. In the scale’s five phases, Phase 1 is minimal and Phase 5 is famine.

Mr. Bourke, the program spokesman, said the hungriest Zimbabweans are now in either Phase 3 or Phase 4.

With Zimbabwe’s last maize harvest down by half compared with the year before because of drought, he said, the aid will continue until at least through the end of April, when the next harvest is due. But he was not optimistic.

“The weather forecasters are basically saying we’re looking at a very dry growing season,” Mr. Bourke said.

Ursula Mueller, the deputy emergency relief coordinator at the United Nations, who visited Zimbabwe in June, said the country’s travails were partly tied to a broader climate crisis in southern Africa that has rippled through all facets of life.

Drought begets less food, which in turn begets declines in health and education and increases in crime and other “negative coping mechanisms,” she said.

Credit…Zinyange Auntony/Agence France-Presse — Getty Images

“This is not just a food crisis, it is a wider more complicated situation,” she said in a telephone interview on Friday. “People have to make choices: Do I seek H.I.V. treatment or food?”

Ms. Mueller also said a United Nations humanitarian budget for Zimbabwe had received only half the nearly $468 million requested, forcing her office to dip into other emergency funding. Humanitarian aid by the United Nations is financed almost entirely by voluntary contributions.

Beyond immediate assistance, Ms. Mueller said, more investments were needed to address the root causes of problems in Zimbabwe and other countries that have the potential for more self-sufficiency.

“We need to move out of this cycle of dependency,” she said. Otherwise, “humanitarians find themselves in protracted situations for years.”

How three Zimbabweans are surviving the meltdown – The Zimbabwean

Most Zimbabweans have been here before. The current inflation rate of 300 percent is well short of the 89.7 sextillion percent recorded in November 2008, and the shortages of fuel, the queues, and the 18-hour power cuts people now endure are familiar.

That doesn’t make it any easier to choose which child to send to school or to figure out where the food will come from if there’s another year with too little rain to nourish a household garden.

From the centre of the capital, Harare, to Zimbabwe’s suburbs and rural communities, The New Humanitarian encountered people who were getting by just fine not so long ago but who now have to reprioritise their needs in a day-to-day hustle for existence.

Many described the current crisis, in which almost eight million Zimbabweans – half the population – will be short of food by January, as particularly bad.

“In 2008, there was nothing in the shops,” said Jessica Pwiti, executive director of Amnesty International Zimbabwe. “This time, it’s everything [that’s wrong].”

The collapse in living standards has triggered a junior doctors’ strike to protest pay and conditions that has lasted more than three months and virtually closed public hospitals.

Cash-strapped city councils are unable to afford the chemicals to treat the water supply or to fix broken sewerage pipes, raising fears that a deadly cholera outbreak is just around the corner. And as schools hike term fees, parents are withdrawing their children – undermining their future.

“The crisis is becoming almost normalised,” said Pwiti. “The government is taking advantage of people’s resilience – it feels like it could go on forever.”

The accounts below are of three people from different walks of life trying to navigate the day-to-day realities of the current emergency.

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The (Legal) War Against Nonbelievers

Last week, evangelical culture in the U.S. was rocked after Mark Galli, the outgoing editor-in-chief of Christianity Today, the most popular evangelical magazine, issued an editorial calling for the removal of the current president from office. In explaining why he was issuing the editorial, Galli stated it was important before making his criticism to understand why the vast majority of Christians will nevertheless continue to support this president. One of the reasons cited by Galli for the continued Christian support, was the president “has done a great deal for religious freedom.” The reason why Christians need a great deal done for them when it comes to religious liberty is again, according to Galli, because there are sectors in “the United States” where Christians “are increasingly being disenfranchised.”

The claim that Christianity or individual Christians are under some sort of legal threat is often repeated by the president himself. In the current president’s view, he is the only thing standing in the way of government somehow taking Christianity away from all of his supporters. Nationally respected magazines have spread the same doomsday warnings about apocalyptic inquisitions that are just around the corner. Conveniently, the culprits or would-be perpetrators responsible just so happen to be the same group the administration literally blames for increasing every “social pathology”: nonbelievers, or those who reject Christianity and Judaism in particular.

Of course, it would be inaccurate to say Christians in the U.S. have never faced bigotry, even recently. On college campuses for example, Christian groups that condemn gay marriage as an abomination and abortion at any stage as equivalent to murder, face significant social backlash. But it is also important to acknowledge that the legal system has rightfully, and thankfully, prevented that backlash from becoming permanently institutionalized. Moreover, it appears the urge to use state power to silence disfavored speech on college campuses is a universal problem that includes the Christian right. The more significant point, however, is that if the legal threats faced by Christians are compared to what nonbelievers currently face, the argument that Christians are the ones who are under threat is turned on its head.

For instance, to my knowledge no state is currently trying to shut out all Christians by making nonbelief a perquisite for any official state act. Yet, just this year a federal court upheld a state’s disenfranchisement of nonbelievers from giving secular invocations. The court’s theory behind barring nonbelievers was “only theistic prayer can satisfy all the traditional purposes of legislative prayer.” This is not a neutral government position but a direct message of exclusion by a federal court to an ever-growing population of nonbelieving Americans.

In another federal court in Texas, a ban on “secular celebrants” from performing marriage ceremonies was recently upheld. Unless it can be shown that secular celebrants somehow harm religious celebrants or religious weddings, it is impossible to identify any state interest for banning secular celebrants from performing weddings for nonbelievers other than outright religious bigotry.  Yet, the federal court in Texas found no constitutional issue with a law that bans nearly a fifth of the Texas population from performing weddings based primarily on whether they subscribe to organized religion or not. There is simply no Christian disenfranchisement equivalent to the type upheld against nonbelievers in just these two cases alone, and I could go on.

In order to appreciate the degree to which nonbelievers are regularly demonized by government officials let’s engage in the experiment I suggested here. Simply replace the word “secularists” with “Christians” or “Protestants” from a speech recently given by the Attorney General of the United States and I suspect many evangelicals would be outraged. For example, what if a nonbelieving Attorney General said:

“On the other hand, we see the growing ascendancy of [Protestants] and the doctrine of [Christianity]. By any honest assessment, the consequences of this moral upheaval have been grim. Virtually every measure of social pathology continues to gain ground.”

Or:

“I will not dwell on all the bitter results of the new [Christian] age. Suffice it to say that the campaign to destroy the traditional moral order has brought immense suffering, wreckage, and misery. And yet, the forces of [Christianity] ignoring these tragic results, press on with greater militancy.”

Is there any doubt evangelicals would react to such statements by an Attorney General with horror and outrage? So why is it okay if the statements are directed at nonbelievers? The likely reason that many evangelicals refuse to acknowledge or take a stand against bigotry toward nonbelievers is they have a distorted, often repeated, inaccurate view that Christians are being “disenfranchised” or legally attacked by secularists.

Those advocating for secular celebrants in Texas are not trying to prevent Christian celebrants from being something that exists. Rather, they are simply asking that those couples who desire to have someone who shares their beliefs and values to be able to perform their marriage. As the Center for Inquiry’s vice president and counsel Nick Little puts it: “All we want is for our celebrants to be allowed to serve our community, without lying and pretending to follow a religion they do not believe in.” The fact one of our most populous states would deny nonbelievers the ability to perform this service, that attorneys would fight to maintain this denial, and that a federal judge would uphold it, should be enough to settle the debate about who is really under legal threat.”


Tyler Broker’s work has been published in the Gonzaga Law Review, the Albany Law Review, and is forthcoming in the University of Memphis Law Review. Feel free to email him or follow him on Twitter to discuss his column.

Trump Is Locking In Judicial Homophobia For A Generation

(Photo by Don Arnold/WireImage)

Easily, the most significant civil rights victory of the decade is the advancement of LGBTQ rights. The struggle continues always, but it’s likely that our children or grandchildren will not remember a time when gay people couldn’t get married.

If Republicans were smart, they would accept the righteousness and morality of the LGBTQ cause, and pivot towards embracing gay equality. Significant numbers of white gay men would likely come back to the Republican party, if the GOP just let them enjoying the trappings and privileges of being white men.

But, because they are Republicans, bigotry and intolerance always gets in the way. Gay marriage might have achieved what appears to be a solid legal victory, but there are other fights for equality and fair treatment under the law. A new report from Lambda Legal illustrates the efforts of President Donald Trump, Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, and, in all likelihood Vice President Mike Pence have made towards making the federal judiciary into the board of directors of Chick-Fil-A. From NBC News:

A third of the more than 50 circuit court judges nominated by President Donald Trump since he took office nearly three years ago have a “demonstrated history of anti-LGBTQ bias,” according to a new report by LGBTQ civil rights group Lambda Legal, which asserts that the justice system is “now indisputably in a state of crisis.”…

“This is a fast-moving train wreck that — unless something is done now — could undermine civil rights protections for the next 40 years.” Sasha Buchert, a senior attorney at Lambda Legal, said of the pace at which Trump is filling the courts. “An entire generation of LGBTQ people seeking their day in court could be facing judges who have made no secret about their hostility to the rights of LGBT people, women and immigrants.”

The play here is obvious. Anti-LGBTQ laws are now, finally, generally unpopular. I mean, there are always going to be pockets of homophobia and they’re always going to be bi-curious politicians overcompensating with draconian legislative proposals. But, in broad strokes, singling out gay people for humiliation as a matter of law is frowned upon in this experimental establishment. The homophobes are an aging, insular minority and the arc of history seems to finally be bending away from them.

Unfortunately, that aging insular minority has taken control of the federal courts. And from there, they can institute nearly-dead hand control over the laws for a generation. We’re likely to see, this June, the Supreme Court re-interpret the Civil Rights Act to exclude gay people. Throughout the Circuit Courts, these Trump judges will not so much deny the right of LGBTQ people to exist (so long as that existence comports with their gender at birth), but deny the right of LGBTQ people to sue to protect themselves from bigotry and inequality in any meaningful way.

And from their lifetime perches on the courts, these bigots can frustrate LGBTQ rights, without any check or retribution from the emerging popular will.

Trump and McConnell’s victory is not yet complete. Any of the Democrats running for President can put a stop to this robed bigotry. Any of them.

A third of Trump’s court nominees have anti-LGBTQ history, report finds [NBC News]


Elie Mystal is the Executive Editor of Above the Law and a contributor at The Nation. He can be reached @ElieNYC on Twitter, or at elie@abovethelaw.com. He will resist.

‘Eight Crazy Nights’ Of Estate Planning Topics To Discuss With Your Family And Friends

(Image via Shutterstock)

Comedian Adam Sandler’s “The Chanukah Song” has become a holiday classic for all regardless of whether or they celebrate the Festival of Lights. A familiar refrain (in all four editions of the song) is the affirmation that “instead of one day of presents” the children who celebrate Chanukah “have eight crazy nights!” (also the name of a Sandler holiday movie).

Surely, part of the crazy that Sandler references is the interaction with family, the giving and receiving of gifts, and, in addition, personal reflections on our own lives. In many ways, the holiday season is the perfect time to think about one’s own estate and personal planning, especially as it coincides with the entry of 2020.

And so, my gift to you are eight estate and personal planning topics for you to think about and discuss with your family and friends, one for each night of Chanukah, crazy or not.

  1. Sign a Last Will and Testament: If you are over the age of 18, regardless of the size of your assets, it would behoove you to sign a Last Will and Testament. That document dictates who gets your money and possessions and who is in charge of your estate, including your electronic and social media accounts, when you die. If you do not like your immediate family, this is especially important because, without a Last Will, your local probate court will determine who gets the inheritance, subject to state law. Additionally, if you have children, the Last Will and Testament determines who becomes guardian of the minors when you die. If you do not appoint someone under a Last Will, the Court will choose the person for you, and, in addition, the person who is in charge of managing the children’s inheritance. Lastly, just writing a Last Will is not enough. You should sign it with proper witnesses and certifications as prescribed by your state’s laws. An unsigned Last Will is worthless.
  2. Sign a Power of Attorney: A Last Will and Testament is the controlling document when you die. But what happens if you become incapacitated during your life as a result of illness or accident? Without a Power of Attorney your loved ones will not be able to access your individual financial accounts nor will they be able to estate plan, sell property, purchase property, or handle a host of other matters.
  3. Sign a Health Care Proxy: A Health Care Proxy appoints an agent to make decisions on your behalf for medical purposes in the event you cannot make them for yourself. (Everyone should execute a Health Care Proxy while they are healthy so that in the event of illness or catastrophe, their agent has proper authority.) Further, you must discuss your health care wishes with your agent so that the agent understands your level of comfort in the event surgeries or more aggressive treatments are advised.
  4. Purchase life insurance: Life insurance is an invaluable product that hopefully does not get realized for a very long time, if ever. Simply, if you have dependents, purchase a life insurance policy so that in the event of your death the survivors have a benefit that can be used to replace the monies that you brought into the family. This is very important if you have children for whom private schooling, camp, or college are planned. Additionally, if the family house is mortgaged, and you wish for the survivors to remain, then the life insurance proceeds will help to defray the costs. Both spouses require life insurance, as the death of either will surely have an impact on the family finances, regardless of whether a spouse works in or outside of the home.
  5. Plan, or at least talk about, the disposition of your final remains: Admittedly this is a macabre topic for the holiday table, however, it is important to note family and religious traditions for the disposition of your final remains. Questions include whether you wish to be buried, cremated, or — in the state of Washington — composted. Perhaps you wish to donate your remains to science. Whatever the case may be, you should discuss it with your loved ones so that your final wishes are carried out.
  6. Take an inventory of your assets: If you do not have an inventory of your assets, make one. Generally, a Last Will and Testament does not list individual assets. It can often be an arduous task for an executor to discern a decedent’s assets. If you make a list and keep it with your Last Will or give it to your attorney, there is at least a record of what your assets were on the date of the signing of the estate planning documents. Moreover it provides you with a knowledge and understanding of what you presently have and perhaps to what you may aspire.
  7. Schedule doctor appointments: This one is not necessarily a legal discussion, however, it is very important. Part of adulting, whether you are in your twenties or eighties, is taking care of your business, both financial and personal. Get your yearly physical examinations so that any issues can be dealt with promptly. Illness has a way of creeping into life plans at inconvenient times. It is often an impetus for estate planning. My blessing for you is that you use the confirmed absence of illness to finalize your estate planning.
  8. Talk to your family about your wishes and about their desires: Use holiday family gatherings to speak to your relatives and close friends about your wishes, should they be nominated as fiduciaries under your documents. Similarly, if you have loved ones who should be planning, encourage them to do so, ask if they have their affairs in order, and encourage them to think about these important issues. Unfortunately, when matters are put off, emergencies are created. At that point, a lot of time and resources can be spent trying to put affairs in order that could have been handled with much ease years prior.

Although the discussion of personal and estate planning may not be so funukkah, when done in good health and peaceful times, it can be a straightforward and pleasant process.


Cori A. Robinson is a solo practitioner having founded Cori A. Robinson PLLC, a New York and New Jersey law firm, in 2017. For more than a decade Cori has focused her law practice on trusts and estates and elder law including estate and Medicaid planning, probate and administration, estate litigation, and guardianships. She can be reached at cori@robinsonestatelaw.com

Holiday Blues

For many, and according to most holiday TV shows, the holidays are a time for amusing conflicts with family and then Christmas reconciliations where you find the meaning and spirit of the season. Sure, you might have been left behind while your family went to Paris, but you discovered something about independence and love of your family, Kevin. You’ll need it in the sequel when you meet the future president (and only “Home Alone” cast member to be impeached, so far).

That isn’t what many feel during the holidays. For some, it is incredibly isolating. They are estranged from their families. For others, it is a time to remember past family outbursts and clashes because, of course, someone had to ruin Christmas dinner. Others have experienced tremendous loss during the year, and the holidays accentuate that loss. In short, while many thrive during this time of year, others do not. And cannot.

According to WedMD, holiday stress is attributable to: “Stress, Fatigue, Unrealistic expectations, Over-commercialization, Financial stress, the inability to be with one’s family and friends.” I would add to that the following: Expectations of others, and, often, being with those same family and friends. You can feel alone, even in a room full of people because, let’s face it, often times those who we love are those that stress us out the most.

I’m no stranger to having holidays ruined. I remember one fine Christmas someone hit a baby. Another, someone decided to start an argument. One year, I was the culprit by taking the bait. It makes one want to change things up, to do something different, to break free. But it can also cause bad behaviors, such as overeating, drinking one’s self free of the pain, or letting others control your thoughts and emotions to the point where you literally make yourself sick from stress.

As Jeena Cho points out, lawyers are more likely to feel depression during the holidays (and more generally) than the population at large. She offers some great advice about being mindful of your thoughts. It’s great advice, and I am tempted to just stop there and refer you to her post. (Seriously, please read it.) But, I have a few things to add from my own experiences:

  1. If you are an introvert stuck in family gatherings, make time for just yourself. It can feel stifling if you are constantly barraged with people wanting to talk to you. If you need time alone, make sure to seek and demand it. Go for a walk. Take a nap. Use headphones to block out the noise and read. Regardless, it’s important to set time aside so you can recharge. Daily.
  2. If you are feeling alone, a change of scenery might be necessary. Often, volunteering at a homeless shelter or other charity can trigger compassion that makes you feel more connected to people. It sounds cliché, but helping others is truly a way to help yourself. If possible, also reach out to family or friends. Often times, our (often warped) perception when we are alone and seeking others is that they are too busy, or don’t want to be brought down, and that prevents us from seeking the company we need.
  3. Set strong limits with people. Unless your family are friends are all empaths, one or more of them probably likes to push buttons. If you have that one family member who likes to talk about something that you find uncomfortable and fails to understand clues such as changing the subject 50 times, then chances are you probably need to “take a phone call” or otherwise excuse yourself. Yelling isn’t a good option here. Often times people push buttons precisely because they want to control your reaction and emotions.
  4. Practice compassion with yourself and others. Everyone is probably on edge a bit during the holidays. So, be compassionate with yourself. As you strive to assure your own self-care, you might feel that you are being selfish at a time of year designed for outward giving. But, as the Dalai Lama’s translator points out: “[It’s] the whole, ‘put [on] your oxygen mask first before helping others’ approach to self care –- which makes a big difference when you are dealing with the demands of raising children, dealing with a difficult boss, or facing a relationship crisis.”The path to wellness, particularly if recovering from psychological trauma, demands self-care. Those with anxiety, or children of alcoholics, know the stresses of being people-pleasers (even to their own detriment). Sometimes it is helpful to remind yourself you have mental health rights, such as those listed here (e.g., “I I have the right to say no to requests or demands I can’t meet; I have the right to change my mind.”)
  5. Economize.  Holiday traditions can both be comforting and overwhelming.  If your usual holiday tradition involves baking 30 types of cookies, you should feel free to limit that if you don’t feel like baking. Perhaps it is a bad example, but it is one from my family. Traditions are meant to offer connections to our family and friends, not to bind. If they feel more like the latter than the former, perhaps it is time to change those traditions.
  6. Stay in the moment. It can often be daunting meeting the demands of others. Friends texting you — while trying to carry on a conversation you don’t want to have — while you are asked to help with doing this chore — while thinking about stuff you left on the desk at work that … Breathe.  Remember that you are human, and that any person worth having in your life will understand when you need to engage in self-care. You can focus on where you are, and what you are doing.

My mind often meanders to the ghosts of Christmas celebrations past. It takes a great deal of effort not to let those ghosts ruin the present. Or, as the Dalai Lama points out, by focusing on the past or the future, our present is robbed. “There are only two days in the year that nothing can be done. One is called yesterday, and the other is called tomorrow, so today is the right day to love, believe and mostly live.”

I wish you and yours a peaceful and joyous holiday season.

If you are struggling, please seek help. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline has a chat option, linked here. The phone number is 1 (800) 273-8255.  If you are deaf or hard of hearing, there are options here.

You are not alone.


LawProfBlawg is an anonymous professor at a top 100 law school. You can see more of his musings here. He is way funnier on social media, he claims. Please follow him on Twitter (@lawprofblawg) or Facebook. Email him at lawprofblawg@gmail.com.