Child
playing
dress
up
as
in-house
counsel
September
19
is
International
Talk
Like
A
Pirate
Day.
I
didn’t
realize
we
needed
a
special
occasion
to
say,
“Arrrr”
all
the
time.
When
is
talk
like
a
lawyer
day?
“Quasi
in
rem!”
or
“Duces
tecum!”
or
“that’ll
be
$1700
for
one
hour
of
‘further
work.’”
Well
there
might
be
a
job
where
every
day
is
both
days.
As
it
happens,
this
is
not
actually
an
invitation
to
join
Long
John
Silver’s
crew
—
actually
that’s
a
different
job
altogether
—
to
litigate
worker’s
comp
claims
about
wooden
legs,
but
an
opening
with
a
shipping
software
company
called
Pirate
Ship.
Though
the
outfit
is
clever
enough
to
realize
what
its
job
listings
look
like
and
lean
into
it,
giving
the
job
another
unofficial
(or,
hell,
maybe
official)
title:
We’re
currently
on
the
lookout
for
exceptional
pirates
to
join
our
crew
as
a
Senior
Legal
Counsel
otherwise
known
as
a
Corsair
Consigliere
to
us
here
at
Pirate
Ship.
The
job’s
responsibilities,
per
the
listing,
include
headings
like
“Keep
litigation
management
shipshape”
and
“Practice
balanced
buccaneering
with
advisory
and
strategic
roles”
and
“Ride
the
tides
in
the
seas
of
change.”
Somewhere
out
there,
there’s
an
experienced
litigator
about
to
unironically
have
this
conversation
with
outside
counsel.
Joe
Patrice is
a
senior
editor
at
Above
the
Law
and
co-host
of
Thinking
Like
A
Lawyer.
Feel
free
to email
any
tips,
questions,
or
comments.
Follow
him
on Twitter or
Bluesky
if
you’re
interested
in
law,
politics,
and
a
healthy
dose
of
college
sports
news.
Joe
also
serves
as
a
Managing
Director
at
RPN
Executive
Search.